June 10, 2021

It was a frustrating day again. I won’t go into it all, but it included work, cancer, and what seemed like my entire life. One of those days where everything seems to be going wrong.

But on my walk back from around the block, I saw this by the walkway. It’s a stepping stone from a friend, and it reminded me to stop thinking the worst, which I’m thankful for.

June 9, 2021

It’s our anniversary! We’ve been married for 3 years. It feels simultaneously longer and shorter than that. How is that possible? I suppose the last year and a half have been long, but when I think back to our wedding, it doesn’t seem that long ago. It was a good day.

When I think back over the last three years, I realize that I’ve been through a lot—job change, kids moving away, cancer—and Patrick has been steady right beside me, not much changing in his world except me. I’m grateful to be keeping him on his toes and adding so much excitement into his life. Haha!

Tonight we celebrated with a good dinner out. I’m thankful for the past three years and look forward to many more.

June 8, 2021

I was crabby today. I’ve been feeling like there is so much in pause mode again. I spent so long in chemo which felt like I was actively working towards my cure, and now, I’m just waiting. It’s frustrating. I thought I had learned patience but some days, it’s really hard. I called my doctors’s office yesterday just to make sure they had let my surgeon know I was done with chemo since I expected to have an MRI to check how much the tumor had (hopefully) shrunk. Thankfully late this afternoon, the surgeon’s office called to schedule an appointment to discuss next options. Not the MRI I was hoping for, but I’ll take it.

June 7, 2021

We started watching Sweet Tooth on Netflix. It’s a show based on some comic books about a post apocalyptic world created by a pandemic. It’s sounds creepy and there are certainly parts that are, but it’s really about a boy who is one of the hybrid animal kids born after the “sickness.”

To be honest, I’m still on the fence about whether I really like it. I like the main characters—the boy and the guy who protects him most of the time—but almost everyone else is kind of horrible. As you can imagine, the hybrid kids freak everyone out, with most blaming them for everything and thus trying to kill them. The world is a bleak free-for-all. It’s a real snapshot of lost humanity.

It makes me grateful that we still live in a mostly civilized society and that our own pandemic, as terrible as it is, hasn’t completely destroyed the world as it has in the show.

June 6, 2021

Today’s church service was about using your gifts. I felt fully convicted since it feels like I’m not using any of my gifts lately. I mean, I’m trying to make my crafts, but I’m selling them only periodically. I didn’t get chosen to be in the craft faire in the Fall, so today I submitted an application for a booth at a vintage mall. I may end up on a waitlist, but we will see.

I’ve been a bit hesitant to take the plunge, but Patrick has been encouraging me. I’m glad to have his support and thankful for the extra push from today’s sermon. I’m hopeful I’ll hear something soon from my application.

June 5, 2021

It was so warm today. So warm. But the breeze made it easy to be outside, at least in the shade. Instead of doing our normal Saturday chores, we ended up going to an outside outlet mall where Patrick got a huge planter on major clearance at Restoration Hardware. I think it was about 99% off. We even asked someone working there if the price tag was missing a number, which was probably a clear sign that we couldn’t afford to shop there. Haha. But we had a fun time searching for bargains. I’m thankful for our little trips out.

June 4, 2021

It’s Fri-day! I’m thankful it’s the weekend. I’m thankful for dinner outside at one of our favorite places while it was perfectly warm and breezy. I’m thankful for cake and a beer. And I’m really thankful to whomever has been praying for me (looking at you, mom!) because my leg soreness is better.

June 3, 2021

It’s been a quiet, rather uneventful day, although we did run into a friend while getting dinner at a food truck. That was a happy surprise.

We’ve been watching some funny sitcoms at night, and I have to say once again that I’m thankful for laughter. It’s good to laugh. For instance, I found the following on Pinterest. Not only is it funny, but it’s true! Especially since tomorrow is Friday. Yay!

June 2, 2021

So…the last week or so I’ve been struggling with extremely sore legs. Like keep me up at night, need to put menthol on them, sore. If I sit too long, it becomes hard to walk. Mix the leg soreness with the stupid rash that doesn’t want to seem to leave my face and my neuropathy that’s even more present, and I feel like my chemo effects have ramped up for a last hurrah. Man, I hope it’s short-lived.

No what, though, there’s always something to be thankful for. for example, just as we were wondering what to have for dinner, our neighbor showed up with homemade egg rolls just out of the fryer. They were delicious.

June 1, 2021

I was worried today when I could hear the baby birds chirping all day long, but I didn’t see the mama bird anywhere. I was half afraid that the dogs had done something terrible. I even checked the yard for feathers after work. However, when I ran to a store after dinner, Patrick texted that the mama had been sighted. What a relief. I’m thankful I don’t need to raise baby birds.