Day 18: Assumptions

I’ve been playing catch up on another tv show. I know, I know…it seems I do a lot of that. I really only have four shows I’m hoping to keep up with: The Walking Dead, Dr. Who, Sherlock and Downton Abbey. Most of them I’ve begun watching because one of my kids or a friend has insisted it’s wonderful and I really should watch it. Last month, I binge watched the first three. This month it’s Downton Abbey. My youngest and I have been watching the show together, which has been great fun. We have the same sense of humor and especially enjoy the cheeky comments of Violet, the Dowager Countess of Grantham. She’s the matriarch of the Grantham clan and often has fabulous one-liners that are completely spot on. I’m half tempted to write them all down and try to work them into my daily conversations, just for fun. My daughter’s and my goal is to get caught up in time for the current episode tomorrow night. We haven’t been able to watch them together at the same time, and I found out that she watched a couple on her phone because she had no access to it any other way. I wasn’t sure how I should feel about that: worried that she’s becoming a tv addict or impressed that she was so determined.

The show has been interesting in that there are so many secrets and cover-ups. It seems very few are able to be truly themselves; most hide behind the masks they are forced to wear because of their position in society. And it isn’t just the aristocracy. Even the servants have roles to play and are forced to hide their feelings in order to do their jobs properly. It’s easy to watch and think, what a shame it is that they can’t just say what they truly think or feel, until the realization hits that life really is often that way. It’s so easy to hide behind the person we present to the world, worried to make a mistake or show our true feelings in case we are rejected. And like what happens in this tv show, we go along on assumptions that aren’t always correct, often to our own detriment.

I recently experienced that with a friend. We hadn’t talked in weeks, mostly because we misunderstood cues from each other. Assuming what wasn’t true and worrying about what it meant, instead of clarifying. Finally, it was too hard to be silent, and just as I figured I was going to have to say something, he did instead. It’s a relief to be free of wondering and know we’re still friends. Today, I’m very grateful for that.

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