Another weekend over. And a long one at that, especially considering that I took a couple of days off work last week as well. Once again, I didn’t get everything finished up that I had planned to, but I made headway on the projects and managed to have a lot of fun in between. And because I’m extra tired tonight, I’m going to leave it as being thankful for that.
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July 5
I went to the Renaissance Faire today for the first time. It was amazing. There was so much to see between the shows and the spectators. And while the shows were pretty good (jousting, comedic sword fighting, acrobats, whip cracking) people watching was the best. There were folks who were completely dedicated to their costumes, elaborate recreations of medieval attire. And folks whose costumes were painfully undersized, or comedically confounding. My friends and I were content at times to simply sit and watch the crowd. And eat…turkey legs and ice cream crepes. I want to go back again only next time I plan on wearing my own costume. I had a lot of fun today; I’m thankful for the new experience.
July 4
Happy 4th of July!! I’m thankful for our beautiful country and the holiday celebration today. Did you know that if you go to USA.gov on Facebook, you can post a birthday wish to America? I love that. I’m also grateful for the beautiful weather we had today, for the little extra painting I got done on my house, and for the great company I had over tonight for a cookout and an official fire in the fire pit. It was a lovely evening, aside from almost chasing ourselves out of the yard with horrible-smelling smoke bombs (really, those should come with a more accurate warning). But no one got hurt and many s’mores were eaten amid the background noise of city fireworks and probable illegal fireworks going off in the neighborhood. I hope your Independence Day was an equally fun-filled and safe day.
July 3
I’m thankful I didn’t fall off the roof of my house today. I’m also thankful for my daughter’s help getting some of the painting done on the outside of the house. Despite the fact that things weren’t completely dried out, we painted anyway. I’m also grateful that the Thursday dinner crew agreed to meet at Old Chicago so I could finish my first beer mini-tour. And that afterwards, my MUV was called into service to help pick up a newly-purchased ladder at Lowe’s that couldn’t fit into my friends’ car. I love rescue missions. Once again, a pretty good day.
July 2
Today was supposed to be cool and sunny with a slight chance of rain so I took the day off to continue painting on my house. I had barely started when the sky clouded over. The slight chance of rain turned into an all-day drizzle. Which means things will be too wet to paint tomorrow as well. The good thing is that there are more days in the summer so I’ll eventually get the painting done. The day wasn’t a loss though. I helped my boyfriend find a house full of curtains for his place, had a great burger dinner, watched some Game of Thrones, and hung out with my daughter and her friends while they watched Pitch Perfect for the umpteenth time. I’m thankful for the way the day ended up.
July 1
A friend of mine posted a link on her Facebook page that said, if you could write a note to your younger self, what would you say in two words? I didn’t comment on it there, but I’ve thought about it since I saw it. Her comment was “stay single,” understandable since she’s going through a difficult time in a relationship right now. Maybe I would have wanted to tell my younger self those same words when I went through my divorce. After all, at the time it seemed like it would be easier to avoid connections altogether than to endure the heartache that follows a break up. But I know I wouldn’t have listened. Relationships are too important to me. So I came up with a bunch of 2 word phrases I could say to my younger self that I think might make a difference in my life today:
travel more, be patient, avoid drama, live purposefully, wait longer, stop worrying, eat healthier, avoid (I’d insert a name here), speak up, practice more, learn guitar, enjoy it, wear swimsuits, pray more, don’t assume…
The list could go on and on. There’s a lot I wish my younger self knew. However, the one two-word combination that I think would make the most impact would be love you. If I were smart enough, I’d see it as both a commentary and a directive. Love you. You’re valuable. You’re important. You’re worth it. Love you. Take care of yourself. Don’t ignore your needs. Don’t put yourself last all the time. I’m thankful that I’m learning to be better at it, but in my younger days I really struggled with the belief that my worth was based on the expectations of others. Believing that I had to prove I was worthy of love, that it was somehow conditional on what I could bring to the table, so to speak. I wish I realized sooner that being lovable is inherent in simply being who you are, not what you can be or do for people. I would have saved myself a lot of disappointment. After all, not everyone is going to love you, no matter what you do for them. Ultimately, it’s more rewarding to find the ones who love you, regardless.
June 30
We’ve had some pretty crazy weather here the last 24 hours. Scattered storms and tornados warnings. A flood warning came tonight as well. I’m thankful that so far nothing more has come of it. I’m hopeful that the storms tonight bring nothing more than thunder and lightning.
June 29
A student called me last night on his way to rehab. Unfortunately, it’s not his first time going. I was hopeful that he was back on track; he had been clean for about six months up until a few weeks ago. He was doing well in school and at his student campus job. You’d never guess he was struggling to keep his life in check. It just goes to show you that everyone has a story and you can’t always tell what it is by appearances. By looks alone, he would seem to be one of the fortunate ones: good-looking, intelligent, talented, well-liked. But as is so often the case, looks are deceiving. He confided in me the first time we met; he wanted me to know that he was trying to get his life back on track. He had gone away to school, got into trouble with drugs and alcohol, and came back home to have some accountability. The first semester he was at school here, he did well. The next semester he dropped out to detox. He came back and did well. Now he’s out again. It’s a cycle that must be exhausting and incredibly difficult. And not just for him. His mother called me today. She wanted to make sure he had alerted me that he wouldn’t be back on campus for a while. We had talked the last time he dropped out, and she cried then just as she did today. She couldn’t hide the sadness and anger as we talked about the disappointment in seeing him this way when he has so much going for him. And how frustrating it is knowing that regardless of all of us wanting and trying to help, the battle is his. Ultimately, he has to find it within himself to stay on the path of recovery. I’ve never struggled myself with an addiction, but I know it’s a constant battle, especially when there’s someone in your life who keeps trying to drag you back into it. For him, it’s an old girlfriend who won’t let go. Who doesn’t see the need for him to stay clean. Who, even when he tries to escape her influence, somehow finds him and gets him to slide back into his old ways. My heart breaks for him and his mother. He’s only in his early twenties, but they’ve already been through so much. I hope this time is the one that works. Today I’m thankful he knew he needed to get help.
June 28
Today’s grateful list:
Lattes at a new coffee shop
Leveling sand for easy brick laying
Breezes that help offset the humidity
Shampoo without the allergic ingredient
Dinner and games with friends
Ice cream cake AND chocolate cake
My cat’s purring
June 27
So I found out today that I’m allergic to an ingredient that is found in a lot of stuff: cleansers, shampoo, lotions, soaps, moisturizers, makeup. When I got home today, I checked some of my products. Seems my shampoo, face cleanser, body wash and hand soap all contain that ingredient. I have a lot of checking to do, I guess. However, I am thankful to have found something I can look to avoid. That’s a good start.
melissagratitude 