I saw my oncologist today for my 3 month visit. I was slightly worried that the thickening I was feeling on my radiated breast was something to worry about, but he thinks it’s just scar tissue. Although he followed that up by telling me to keep an eye on it. My other concerns about my continued joint pain could be residual chemo effects. Or being old. And overweight. Visits to his office are always great for my ego. I am thankful that everything is still looking well.
I also had another massage after work today and my new masseur was excellent. I felt properly beat up, so I’m also thankful for that.
I haven’t made any resolutions, but I have already been working on getting healthier. Chance is not a fan. It makes him nervous when I’m on the floor doing exercises. Usually he lays next to me or tries to stand over me, like he’s protecting me. It gets a bit difficult, so I’ve started using the space between the bed and wall where he can’t get to me. Now he stands on the bed and stares at me instead. Not at all distracting.
I’m thankful for his devotion, and I’m also thankful to be gaining some strength back.
We were in bed last night by 10:00 pm. Maybe one day we will celebrate until midnight, but this was not the year. Hopefully next year neither of us are sick.
I’m thankful today for sleeping in, vacation ideas, getting some areas of the house organized, and decent weather. I’m also thankful that tomorrow is another day off work.
I was lamenting the other day that the last few years have ended lousy. In some aspects, I feel like this one has, too. Mostly because I’d like the new year not to include remnants of my breast cancer, and next year will be more plastic surgery visits and ovary removal. But here we are.
I mentioned I was disappointed when my plastic surgeon told me he would be referring me elsewhere, but I’ve come to realize why I was really upset. At the beginning of my time with him, he was extremely positive. Always hopeful. I looked forward to seeing him because it was like a glimmer of happiness during the hard days. I felt like I would eventually get back to normal. Him referring me elsewhere felt like giving up on all of that.
It’s really amazing how much we impact each other as human beings. One person’s decisions can have a ripple effect. We each take our hopes/desires/fears/expectations into every encounter we have, and it shapes us in ways we only realize later.
My doctor didn’t know how important his presence was in my journey. I never told him. His decision to drop me as a patient, I’m assuming, has less to do with me than with his clinic’s decision to stop accepting insurance.
I don’t want to enter this new year without hope. On any front. So I’m going to believe my new doctor will be amazing. I’ll finally get closure on my cancer and move on. Next year will be more than the ending of this journey. Life is good.
I hope you enter the new year knowing how much you mean to others, whether you know it or not. And remember that others actions don’t always have to do with you. Give grace. Stay optimistic. Be thankful.
I took today off work, which was probably good since my head cold was a bit worse this morning. It got better as the day went on and then worse again towards evening. Typical. I’m still hoping it doesn’t morph into anything more serious.
I’m thankful I was able to sleep in a bit. And although I ended up logging on and working for a short while in the morning, it was nice to do nothing. I’m thankful for a relaxing day.
I really hope Patrick’s head cold hasn’t found it’s way to me. I felt a bit yucky most of the day—sinus drainage and such. It probably doesn’t help that our weather has swung from -31 windchill to almost 60 degrees. Crazy. And not good on the sinuses. I might have also felt lousy from a terrible night’s sleep last night, so I’m lucky that Chance is a good snuggler.
I’m thankful today for a good conversation, good meds, hot tea and ice cream.
I’m thankful that I got massage gift cards for Christmas, and today I had a massage with my masseur’s replacement. I hate to admit that it wasn’t so good. The new guy was nice, but he seemed nervous and was inexperienced. And he wore a rubber glove because his skin was so dry he said his knuckles were split. (Um…rubber gloves do not work well during a massage, fyi.) Since he’s fresh out of school, I expect he’ll get better, but I’m also thankful there are a few other folks at the clinic to try. I really need to continue getting my range of motion back, so I’d like to find someone more experienced. At least for now.
Today I’m thankful for a day off work spent running errands and having lunch with Patrick, who is feeling slightly better from his head cold. I’m also thankful for a quick FaceTime call with Bree and Noah, who made it back home safely from their holiday travels.
melissagratitude 