Another successful day working around the house outside. I cannot get enough of the sunshine and good weather. And I ended the day hanging out with friends. A lot times, I really am thankful for the small stuff.
May 23
I’m sore. It was the first day of what we term “summer hours” at work. Everyone who works year round gets Fridays off early in the summer; the college shuts down at 1 pm. There is a group of us who usually try to get together in the afternoon to hang out on a deck somewhere and enjoy some drinks and maybe whiffle ball. Of course, as luck would have it, I wasn’t able to go. Well, I could have, but I had an incredibly bad allergy morning, where my left eye was almost swollen shut. I ended up back in the immediate care and back on steroids. By 1 pm, I looked only slightly less like I had gone a couple rounds in a boxing ring. I decided it would be best if all of my work friends did not see me looking quite so battered. So instead I worked alone in my yard. I’ve been converting the area where an above ground pool had been taken out into a fire pit area instead. Last weekend I finished building the retaining wall and today I pulled all the weeds out of the sand. I didn’t think it was that hard of labor, but my legs apparently thought so. At any rate, it was rewarding to see clean sand and get a little sunburn on my shoulders. Even though I didn’t hang out with my friends, I’m thankful I had the afternoon off. And even more thankful my eye eventually calmed down. Fingers crossed for the morning.
May 22
Everyone probably knows the quote that says The worst distance between two people is misunderstanding. Sometimes it reads as the longest distance, but the sentiment is the same. Failing to connect because you can’t grasp what the other person is saying over your own point of view, especially if your view is tinged with strong emotions. It’s a calamity to let misunderstandings with someone you care about lie unresolved. Yet why is it so easy to let our emotions dictate our judgement? And sometimes so hard to extend the olive branch? Why do we sometimes persist in our stubbornness to the point of letting people go? Life is too brief to be unyielding. Pride is a false disguise for pain. It only makes the pain harder to bear.
I’m thankful today to have bridged the distance with someone I care about. It’s a weight lifted to have revisited where things went wrong without the burden of emotion and have an honest conversation about how to make things right again. To say I’m sorry and mean it and to hear the same back. There’s curative powers in being vulnerable. The relationship may not be the same as it was, but we have a different place to begin again and that’s the whole point. There’s no ending, just an evolution. And this time, the connection may be even better.
May 21
Tonight I went to a high school sports banquet for my youngest daughter. It wasn’t exactly how I was hoping to spend my evening. First of all, I was mislead by the term banquet. There really was no food. Well, there were snacks of some sort afterwards, but each sports team met individually after the event and my daughter’s coach talked so long that we missed out on all of it. By the time we got home after 9:00 pm, we were so hungry we simply stood in the kitchen raiding cupboards and the fridge for whatever looked good. Thankfully, I’ve cut back on buying junk food, so dinner wasn’t a total disaster. I found some Triscuits, cheese that wasn’t too dried up, dried cranberries, and a few celery sticks. And a handful of Skittles for balance. Not the best meal after spending my evening with a room full of athletes, I know.
The other part of the banquet that made it less enjoyable was knowing that my daughter wasn’t there to receive an award. It was really an awards ceremony for the seniors or those on varsity teams, and my daughter is neither. She’s a sophomore and a first-year track team member. But they required all team members to go for team support, and my daughter wanted me to go. So we clapped happily for the tennis team, the softball and baseball teams, the soccer team (which apparently had quite the record season) and the boys and the girls track teams. I’m sure I’m forgetting some. Oh, and when the individual teams met, we clapped for all 100 girls on the track team who were called up one by one to shake hands with all four of the coaches. And then I waited while my daughter stood in line for her letter and pin, and her expensive t-shirt, and pictures with all of her friends.
Even though the night wasn’t that exciting, I went into it reminding myself of one thing. My rather nonathletic daughter decided to join the track team. The daughter who rolls her eyes and tries to come up with any excuse not to do manual labor at home. The girl whom we dubbed the couch potato is now running sprints for her school track team. And not complaining about it. In fact, she sometimes asks to go to the gym with me. And talks about eating healthier. And as I sat watching all the kids getting awards tonight, I know that one day I could be sitting there while she gets her own award. She likes track enough to want to do it again next year, and her coach (one of them) suggested she consider long-distance running. I hope she does. As I watched her taking pictures with her friends, I was glad that she was part of the team. For even though she’s never been shy or lacking friends, I know teammates can bring friendships to a different level and can serve an important role in character development. For that I’ll thankfully trade an evening.
May 20
I spent half of my work day at a training session for managers. It was organized well and the speaker was very engaging. The most interesting part of the session was about the various generations: The Silent Generation (Great Depression era), Baby Boomers (1946-1964), Generation X (1960s-1980), and The Millennials, (1980s-2000s). The cultural differences between generations is both striking and fascinating to me, especially the differences between Gen X and Millennials. There are roughly 80 million people in the Baby Boomer generation and about 78 million Millennials and only 46 million in Gen X, my generation. The impact that will have on our workforce will be noticeable. As the Baby Boomers retire, not only will the age demographics of our workforce become quite a bit younger, but the characteristics and values will have a major shift. There is a vast difference between Generation X and Millennials. Gen Xers were the “latch-key” kids, growing up in an age of two working parents or single parent households as divorce became common. Therefore, they are typically highly independent, adaptable and work to live. Conversely, Millennials grew up with “helicopter” parents and team environments and constant feedback or recognition. Now, as these two generations merge in the work force, there will be hurdles to overcome as far as work expectations. One group likes autonomy, the other teamwork. One needs regular feedback and support, the other is independent.
All of this fascinates me. Partly because I’m simply intrigued by human interactions and social dynamics, but also because I can already see some of this disparity happening at work. The student workers I hire fall squarely in the Millennial generation. It’s sometimes hard for me to understand their need for, what seems to me, hand holding. In my generation, we simply figured things out and did what needed to be done. But that’s not their experience. And that’s good to know. It may not be easy, but understanding the differences will help in figuring out how to work well together. I’m thankful I was able to go to the training today.
May 19
Today was restful. I had a quiet day at work and no demands on my evening, which was rare. I was able to take a bath, eat a delicious dinner, and watch a bit of tv. I even got a bit of snuggle time in with my cat, which he loved. It’s nice to have unfettered days like today. They’re scarce, so I’m thankful for this one today.
May 18
It was a productive weekend in many ways. I love when I can go to bed on a Sunday feeling exhausted and accomplished. I’m thankful for many things today, but the one that I want to put out there is the fact that my GRE studying paid off. I got my grad school acceptance letter this weekend, so I’ll start classes in the fall. I’m actually very excited to add student back on my to do list.
May 17
It’s been almost a year since I bought my house and lived on my own with my girls. When I think about it, my initial reaction is to wonder how it’s been that long. But in some ways, it’s been a very long year. So much has happened and so many things have changed. And a lot of that has been good. In the last couple of days, I’ve been thinking a great deal about where I am and where I think I’m heading. While I’m still unsure about exactly where I WANT to be, I am confident that where I’m at is a good place, regardless of the uncertain days. I have a life that is full of people and activities and things that are familiar and comforting to me. And right now, I’m hesitant to venture too far out of it. I don’t think my hesitancy is out of fear as much as out of my current need for stability. I still need this life of succor I’ve created for myself in the past year. I can’t bring myself to make changes that don’t feel 100% right, even if it means I may be passing up on something potentially great. This was actually a surprising realization for me. This longing for the familiar. Maybe it’s simply my reminder to slow myself down and settle in to my life as it is. After all, there aren’t too many missing pieces. And eventually, even those will find their way here. I’m thankful today for what I have. Today it’s enough.
May 16
Tonight after my college’s graduation ceremony, we had a reception for faculty and staff. I almost didn’t go. My allergies were bothering me again, and I wasn’t sure I was up to socializing. However, I was part of the committee that put the reception together, so I did feel a small measure of guilt for wanting to skip it. So after a nap and some medicine, I put myself together and went. I ended up talking with a lot of people I don’t normally get to see on a daily basis, which was fun. There was also a recognition of the newly tenured faculty and our provost had a very touching speech he gave thanking them and the rest of us for the role we all play in our students’ lives. Later, more people danced than I expected, which was a pretty interesting sight to see. Overall, It was a good evening.I ended up staying later than I planned to, but I’m thankful tonight that I went.
May 15
After months of whining about the snow and cold and ice storms, it was a joy to see this tree covered in white today. That’s one thing that is amazing about spring: flowers show up over night. I’m so thankful today for the beauty of the season, especially what’s in my own front yard.
melissagratitude 