It was a lovely, warm and sunny day, and I accompanied almost everything on my to-do list. I cleaned up and reorganized a spot in the basement, fixed a squeaky door, swapped out some clothes in my closet, cleaned up the flower beds in the front lawn, and ran some Easter errands. By 5:00 my body reminded me that I’m not used to so much physical labor in one day. Good thing I got a new heating pad. My back is thanking me.

I’m grateful for getting so much done, for the sunshine and nice weather, and for this special Easter treat left on my doorstep. I have the best friends. Chance wants to fight me for it, though.

I’m thankful today for sunshine, drinks with colleagues after work, Sherlock, and long weekends.

A friend asked me if I would talk about my cancer journey on a podcast she’s guest co-hosting with another friend. They’re talking about different forms of grief and wanted to include the loss associated with a major diagnosis. A couple of the questions they asked forced me to really think about where I felt I am now. One question was about the hardest moments during my treatment and the other was what I see as my growth path going forward.

What I realized (after we stopped recording of course) is that the hardest part of it was letting go. Previously I felt I had control of my life and if I just tried hard enough, I could orchestrate whatever outcome I wanted. My cancer experience blew that all to hell. I had to learn to sit in the misery of it and let it unfold as it would. And I’m still sitting in it. But that’s also where I’m learning to grow—by making peace with letting go and appreciating my life just as it is.

Grief expert David Kessler talks about finding meaning as a sixth stage of grief. Not finding meaning IN the loss but meaning within yourself after loss. This idea is important to me. And while grief isn’t a linear process, I’m thankful to feel like I’m making progress towards meaning. I’m also thankful for my friends and our discussion today. Hopefully it’s helpful to others.

Check out the podcast here: https://www.whatwomenwanttoday.com/

I did not want to get out of bed this morning. I was in a perfect, warm and comfortable spot in bed, so I hit snooze and contemplated taking today off work. It would have been a great day to stay in bed since it was gloomy and rainy again. But I went to work.

I’m thankful that the storms weren’t too bad and didn’t last too long. I’m thankful I made it to the polling place to vote in our local election. And I’m thankful the birthday gift I ordered for my friend finally arrived. It was down to the wire. Although we celebrated last weekend, today is her actual birthday so I’m happy I got to drop off her gift and say happy birthday once more.

I’m thankful today for hot tea, cute baby photos, jeans that fit, and a walk in the neighborhood.

I’m super thankful today that I drank responsibly last night. I did sleep in, but I felt fine otherwise. So Patrick and I ran errands and tried a new restaurant for lunch and enjoyed the nice turn in the weather.

I’m also thankful for this birthday boy who turned 9 today. He (and his brother) got a walk around the block, doggie ice cream, and a new bone.

Today we celebrated a friend’s birthday. A bunch of us met at a bar, and she had arranged a limo so we didn’t have to drive. Originally, Patrick and I were going to meet for a drink or two but not follow the group as the made their way from one bar to the next. Then someone backed out, so I was invited to join them for the whole evening. I had to take a nap ahead of time just to make sure I could stay awake until midnight. Haha! But I did. And it was a fun night. One place we stopped even had a small indoor sand volleyball setup, which was unexpected and entertaining. The final place had a band playing. I’m thankful I was included, and we all had a fun night, especially the birthday girl!

Wow, the week was long but the days went by quickly. Does that even make sense? I guess it’s just that the days have really been busy with never-ending work. Unfortunately, it also means I’ve had little energy in the evenings so I’ll have some messes to get back to (I left my craft room is disarray last weekend to name one). That’s ok. Our week here has ended with thunderstorms, which makes it a good night to curl up and relax. I’m thankful for that.