I have a spot on my tummy incision that my doctor’s office thinks could be a spitting suture. I thought the nurse misspelled “splitting” but after a google search, I discovered it means a stitch coming to the surface. I’ve been instructed to use warm compresses and antibiotic ointment on it. I’m thankful it’s not actually splitting. I got real nervous for a second visualizing a gaping wound. In fact, most of my incisions are mostly healed. There are some big scabs on my breasts that are still hanging on, but I’ve done really well not picking at anything. And since I’m forbidden from using lotion or anything, I’m really hoping the scars left behind aren’t too bad. I’m glad that every day is a little better, and my physical therapy is helping the tightness and scar tissue.
Mostly healed—even my new bellybutton!These scabs are hanging on like crazy.
I had my follow up appointment this morning with my plastic surgeon, and I got the wound vac from my stomach as well as three of the four drains removed. I have one remaining in my left hip. The doctor is happy with the progress and of my healing. The incisions look good and the transferred skin is looking healthy. My left breast, which was my problem side all along, is feeling firmer already though. He says it could be some fat dying off or some possible bruising underneath, but it isn’t anything too concerning. He does want me to go to physical therapy soon as it might help with the tendon tightness that is still present.
He also confirmed that the pathology report stated there was some potential skin necrosis happening in my left breast prior to surgery. He said it was quite a mess, so I’m grateful I was finally able to get this done before I had no choice anymore. Now I’ll be wearing compression garments for a while and have a follow up appointment again in a week.
I’m also thankful that I got some visitors today. A couple of friends stopped by with lunch, and we sat outside for a little while and caught up.
Then some other friends stopped by before dinner, and we sat on the deck, too, since it was such a gorgeous day for being outside. They also brought me a gift which made me laugh. They know me well. Skulls and flowers! And coffee! 🤩 It was a good day.
I’m home! I was doing so well, they let me leave the hospital a day early. Of course the incisions still look horrible. There is no covering on my new breasts so the incisions are viewable. There’s a lot of bruising and swelling, but the blood flow to my new tissue has been strong, so the likelihood of them failing now is pretty slim. It’s hard to stand upright still, and walking is slow, but my pain is minimal—unless I need to cough. Then it’s miserable.
I got settled at home while the pups were outside, so my arrival was fairly uneventful, which was good. I still have 4 drains in my sides and a wound vac on my stomach. All items very interesting to a pup. The last thing I need is for one of them to jump on me. I think they missed me though. Once they came in and saw me and eventually settled down, they laid by my chair.
I’m thankful to be home—a big step in my recovery.
Today we got a new air conditioner put in at our house. It went well and seems to work well. Our old one was 34 years old, so I’m assuming this is one will work more efficiently. It’s already quieter. I’m thankful for that.
I’m also thankful for spontaneous dinner out with a friend. We took some photos ahead of time, so she could have new head shots for her busy consulting work. Then we celebrated that our podcast that came out today and ran into my plastic surgeon, who chatted with us a bit. I was able to tell him how much his positive attitude meant to me during my visits with him. It was good conversation and needed connections midweek.
I’m calling a moratorium on white shirts. The last few I tried on had very faint stains on them, most likely coffee. I threw one out today. Then just before I left for my doctor’s appointment, I changed into a cute one in an attempt to feel cooler. Thankfully, it was stain-free. After my exam, I put my shirt back on and noticed—in the exam room mirror—a spot on my shirt. Somehow, I got a stain without eating or drinking or doing anything other then sitting. What the actual heck. I’m a mess.
My feet were hanging about a foot above the ground. This was my entertainment.
To be fair, I did have to wait almost an hour and 45 mins for my plastic surgeon who was running behind. Maybe I fell asleep and someone spilled something on me. But the big news is I no longer need to put silicone tape over my incisions. Apparently, it’s breaking down my skin a little in spots. And the sore (my doctor called it an ulcer) isn’t too bad yet, even though it’s bigger than it was. I now need to cover it with gauze and leave it be. I can’t even tape the gauze. If it’s not healed by next week when I go back in to have stitches removed, then I’ll need weekly checks on it. I’m hopeful it will heal.
I got most of my other questions answered. The hard spots I’m beginning to feel are from the fat grafting; I can massage them to help soften them up. The tight muscle in my neck is from the implant pulling on it; eventually it should feel better. The pain along my side is most likely from nerves damaged from radiation, not from the surgery. That should also get better. Once my ulcer is healed, I can stop wearing compression bras, but I can’t swim or soak in a tub for several more weeks.
I’ll probably need more fat grafting in a few months to the area that was too thin for him to work in much before. I mentioned that the skin felt so fragile there that I was worried I would damage it if I scratched too hard. He said I probably would. EEK! He suggested going back to using Vitamin C/E serum on my skin to help with the healing. Man, that radiation may have helped save my life, but it did no favors to my skin.
However, I’m really thankful that things are healing well overall, and I’m so close to being completely done. In a couple weeks I can wear a bra that won’t squeeze my ribs. Each week I’m feeling more like my old self. That’s a good thing.
I saw my plastic surgeon today for a follow up. He explained again what he did and where he took the fat from. I’ll go back on Friday to have my bandages replaced with silicone tape. Everything looked good; he simply cautioned me not to lift more than 5 pounds and to wear my sports bra 24/7 for the next 6 weeks.
I was able to take the bandage off my stomach. He went through my belly button for the fat grafting, so I really expected to see a lot of bruising around it. It’s mostly bruised inside, so that wasn’t too bad. My hand looked worse. I’m guessing they broke a blood vessel there.
I’m thankful things are looking well. I’m still tired and sore, but I’m able to move a little bit better today.
Well, it’s less than 2 days to my surgery, and I’m starting to think about it. I’m always nervous before surgery (who isn’t??) but this time I’m also excited about it. So long, rocks! I cannot wait for my chest to feel normal again. Or as normal as it can be considering it will still be implants.
Things I’m looking forward to after a year:
Laying on my stomach. Getting a good massage because I can lay on my stomach. Breathing normally. Maybe getting a full stretch out of my left arm. Wearing shirts that fit properly. Wearing shirts with stripes that don’t zigzag weirdly across my uneven breasts. Sleeping on my side. Holding something against my chest. Giving really tight hugs. Bending over without pain. Jumping jacks.
Just kidding on that last one. I don’t care if I can do jumping jacks again.
I’m trying to focus on the positives with this surgery and not on what makes me nervous about it. But today I was talking to someone who asked if I was going to be ok on Friday. Um, yes. I’d better be. And don’t jinx me like that. I told Patrick that if something crazy happened and I died on the table, my plastic surgeon better finish up. I’m not going out without great boobs. I’ve waited too long.
Probably the biggest thing that makes me nervous is not knowing what to expect afterwards. Since I’ll also be getting fat grafting, I’ll have some pain/discomfort from the liposuction to my stomach, but who knows how much. Or what my stomach will eventually look like. And although my plastic surgeon discussed how he would pull up some of my stomach skin to help create the missing inframammary fold on my left side, I just can’t visualize the outcome.
There are still a lot of “what ifs” rolling around in my head, yet my gratitude for finally being at the end of this long path is going to win out. It’s going to be fine. Maybe even good. Or great. After all, I have a lot of things I’m looking forward to.
I saw my plastic surgeon today for my pre-op appointment. He was running behind, but I talked extensively with his nurse about my upcoming surgery. Even though I’ve seen him numerous times and know the plan, I still had a list of questions, like what kind of implants and how much recovery time.
My questions are answered. Smooth gel implants. Four hour surgery. Incisions below my breasts. Hopefully no need for drains. About a week recovery but that will depend on the fat grafting. Both the nurse and my doctor agreed that this surgery should be much easier to recover from than my last.
My doctor also drew on my again while measuring for implant size, all the while explaining what he plans to do and why. He also explained why I may need bigger implants or different sized ones. The spacers are hard, and the implants will be soft, which means they take up space differently.
At this point, I can’t even imagine what it’s going to feel like to be rid of these miserable spacers. I hope it feels like nothing actually. I would love nothing more than to not think about my breasts again. I’m grateful to be so close to being done!
Today I got my final bandages removed. My appointment was with the nurse, but my doctor showed up anyway jokingly saying he couldn’t resist. I think he was curious about the incisions, which he claims are healing well. He also decided to add saline to the side that wasn’t fillable during surgery to start evening me out. After some discussion about upcoming radiation, he said he’d like me to come in next week as well to add a little more. Once radiation starts, we will probably stop filling until treatments are done.
It feels so much better having the bandages removed. Less pressure. However, I’m not sure I was fully prepared to seeing the incisions as they are. I was expecting something more delicate but these look angry and red. The skin is folded a bit too, which must eventually stretch out. It’s funny. Of course, the process of the surgery was explained to me ahead of time. I even did my own research. When my doctor did the markings before surgery, he told me what they meant and where the incisions would be and how the stitches would be underneath and eventually dissolve. But I didn’t ask what it would look like post surgery. Or during the fill process. Or even once it’s all done. I guess I just wanted the cancer gone and trusted that my plastic surgeon would put me back together. Now that I’m at this point, I have questions and I’ll know what to ask at my next visit.
It’s been 9 months since my cancer diagnosis. I’m thankful I’m so far along in this whole process and healing well. And I’m thankful that I trust my plastic surgeon, even though things look a bit dubious at the moment.
Yay!! My plastic surgeon took out my drains today!
I will say that getting them removed was really something. I had two on each side, so two nurses worked together to take them out at once. After they clipped the sutures, they grabbed both and pulled in one long motion. All four at once. Patrick was watching and said each one was at least 12-18” long, and I could feel every twist as they came out. It burned but wasn’t really painful, thank goodness. Just weirdly uncomfortable.
While they took off the binding on one side, the P. Surgeon wanted to leave the other side intact for another week. Even so, he gave me the ok to shower again. BEST. DAY. EVER. Well, ok, best in a couple weeks. And I showered as soon as possible once we got back home. Because I could.
I saw my plastic surgeon in the afternoon, but I had an appointment with my general surgeon in the morning. He explained how his portion of the surgery went, giving us an anatomy lesson in the process. Did you know breast tissue typically extends up to the second rib and has to be peeled off of the chest muscle during a mastectomy? And that there is a visible difference between tissue and muscle? The upside to knowing this is that the area that showed positive margins for cancer was where the tissue and muscle met. That means my tumor was right to the edge of my breast tissue, and according to my surgeon, it wasn’t like the tissue extended into the muscle.
Now, since so much of this cancer stuff gets overwhelming and confusing and scary, I like to ask a lot of questions during my visits, sometimes repetitively, and without fear of sounding stupid. Yesterday I asked my oncologist if the only way cancer could spread is through the lymph nodes. He said yes. And then through the blood. He assured me that my breast cancer could not just move directly from my breast tissue into my muscles.
My takeaway is that there is a good chance my surgeon really did get all of the cancer, and any microscopic cells left behind should be eradicated by the upcoming radiation. I’m thankful for that. I’m also thankful that both my surgeons had the same reaction to how my healing is progressing —an almost surprised happiness. I think it’s because there was worry about adequate blood flow to one side. It was deep purple after surgery but today it’s almost bruise-free. Their reactions and explanations helped ease my mind about how things are going.
melissagratitude 